I just gotta get this outta my system.
Those people that are so afraid to ‘impose’ upon their kids? That would rather not share their beliefs because they think their kids should have a ‘choice’ and not be influenced by them? That think that their kids should think for themselves and trying to help them out by giving their perspective would be helping them out at all?
(I’m not saying who.)
Look. I’m not even trying to talk strictly in terms of religion. I just mean anything and everything you believe! About God or not, about life, about politics, about the world, about everything! If you’re not going to ‘impose’ your beliefs upon your child, SOMEONE ELSE WILL!
Children need guidance. Children need to know what their parents’ stance is. Children need to know why their parents think the way they do, why they do the things they do, what beliefs influence them in how they live out their lives day to day, who they think are good role models and who they think are bad influences. Children need stability. Children need a concrete foundation. If parents aren’t going to provide that for them, then other people will.
Now, if you really don’t care which way your child goes, then by all means, leave them for the rest of the world to coach and just ask them what they’re learning about every now and then and don’t offer your opinion about what they’ve been learning.
But seriously! If you care about your child, are you really going to risk them attaining undesirable info at young ages from people you would much rather they not be in contact with?
Teenagers will rebel. Fine. But since when has teenage rebellion been equated with maturity?
When children are not yet at the age where they can leave the house and fend for themselves, they ought still be guided.
Teens rebel, not because they’re mature, but because they’re going through weird things. They’re dealing with a lot of confusing stuff, like peer pressure. They’re soul searching. They’re hungry for things they never realized they’re hungry for. They hunger for Truth. Truth about everything! Who’s gonna give it to them? Why wait and see? Why risk their possibly being influenced by the wrong people, the wrong books, the wrong situations, the wrong stuff? Granted they’ll be exposed to things you don’t want them to deal with, if you’re a truly caring parent. So why leave them unprepared? Why not tell them what you believe, what your stance is, what you think they’re doing right or they’re doing wrong?
They’re not always gonna be happy about it. So? Does that justify silence on your part? Are you going to go with the apathetic, “You got yourself into it, it’s not my problem, I had nothing to do with it” excuse? Yes! Exactly! You had nothing to do with it. If you’d said something, maybe they’d’ve done something else! They won’t always listen. Sure. I know that. I don’t always listen. But Mum and Dad’s consciences are a lot clearer, I bet, by sharing their views, even if I don’t listen on the spot, than by keeping their silence and letting me find out things the hard way with ultimately no option precisely because they failed to offer me the better one. Maybe one day, a teen will look back after all the mistakes they made and remember some piece of advice given from the heart by either their Mom or Dad and realize that all their parents were trying to do was fulfill their role as parents who love their child.
I just don’t get how anyone could NOT get the gravity of the situation. It’s not ‘imposing’! They’ll make their own choices when they’re adults, but until they reach that point, why not share the lessons you’ve learned when all you’ve got are their best interests at heart? Just because they don’t appreciate it on the spot doesn’t mean they won’t one day.
The only real failure is the one who fails to try.
Wisdom takes a lifetime to gain and apply; it might take the person years to process the advice they were given, but if there’s just the tiniest chance that they’ll have a better life for it, then why the silence?